Lord, it is depressing to read in Kings and Chronicles. Kings who started out well, and who You took care of magnificently, became hardened against You. Either they became full of self-pride or they abandoned You for other“gods”even the “gods” of their enemies that You had enabled themto defeat!
This terrifies me. Please do not let me fall from the path that You have started me on. I can see all too easily how it could happen.
Lord – I’m scared.
— Don’t be…—
but why?
— Because I will carry you. —
but what about those kings?
— Pride was their downfall. —
but I have pride, too.
— Not the same thing —
but Lord, I don’t understand it.
— You don’t need to. —
but?
— Softness. I soften your heart towards Me. —
but what about them?
— Determined hardness. —
I see teeth clenching.
— Teeth clenching pride. —
I’m confused.
— I know you are,
but you can trust Me.
I won’t leave you to your own devices.
I know you are helpless
It is no surprise to Me,
only to you.
I have been but letting you feel it lately. It is
miserable and frightening for you. I know that.
To “see” yourself is a scary thing. It leaves you
feeling as though you are “hanging out there”
You aren’t –
but you would be if left to your own.
That is simply what you need to know
- that you aren’t some “spiritual giant”
nor do you have to be,
nor will you ever be.
Do you think I love you any the less for that?
You do, don’t you?
But I don’t. —